Labels: luv. tots .
i realised im becoming lost nowadaes..
during the grp conver..they were lyk saying..which guy u find the cutest blahs..but somehow..i dun feel it anymore..last time..i can easily go gaga over shuai guys..eyecandies..bt now..maybe i haf grown up..i reali reali look veri much deeper..haha..lyk he muz be nice etc..
y is it tat my heart dun beat as fast now..where were the feelings yrs ago..those when i saw lc..haha..is it i dun haf the capacity to feel my heart pumping anymore..maybe i haf aged..become matured..
jus tat maybe when we grow up..we realise love works two way..maybe when we were young..we dared to luv..as long as ahh..i lyk tat person..we'll go and lyk him..but now..we haf grown up..become more practical..more mature..we noe wats possible wats not..we dun go pursue an impossible dream anymore..the person jus seems lyk an impossible dream isnt it..then okays..we forget abt it..we move on..
reali..if we can chose the person we lyk to lyk us back..i'll luv bravely..but we cant..maybe im jus afraid to luv..afraid tat im not good enough for the person..not perfect enough..has flaws the person cant stand etc..
its so so hard..for the person u lyk to lyk u back..maybe im protecting myself..or we are protecting ourselves.. by not falling too hard for someone..in case the heartaches of no reciprocation follows..
u noe..im alwaes feeling inferior..tat if i lyk someone..i wont be good enough for him..so i alwaes haf tis stress to improve myself..so tat i can match up..sometimes..its reali tiring..
maybe one dae..i can go back to young times..and luv bravely for once..regardless of whether the person lyks mi or not..or maybe..one dae..i'll lyk a person who will hopefully lyk mi back..but it jus seems far away..
its alreadi 3.30am now..gosh..so tireds..meeting 2b gals tmr..yeas..nitenites..(:
love
---2:45 AM---
